i should updatee.. i know i knoww. but im so lazy.. jesus christt.

*movie to watch*

::rain::

its raining... and its gloomy and blue.. i love this weather. lot of people say that pouring down rain
 can be very depressing.. but not me. ever since i was a careless kid i would go out into the rain and
jump into the puddles, and follow the little stream of water all the way down to the sewers.. make lil paper boats and race them wit mai friends until they got so wet, it couldnt go no more. i would come home, and i be so dirtee from head to toe.. hahah, my mom used to yell at me, telling me wut the fuk is wrong witchu.. But couldnt smile at the dirt around mai face.. and mai hair... the spiky replica turned into a big mushy mess. ^_^ like i said, i was careless then. if mai hair was mush now??? ill go ape shit. well back to the rain.. for some weird reason.. every raindrop that falls gives me hope. yeah i know its all cliche and weird.. but reallie.. it tells me that everything is okay and i juss gotta keep mai head up. u kno wut kind of music is good for rainy weather? slow mellow rap... or good vocal trance.. it juss sets the moOd. the mellow shit and the sound of tricklin, pouring rain is perfection. its like an orchestra gettin freakee.. great methaphor. props to erik. anywaise..im openin more up to yall peeps. u guys probably think im obessed wit rain or somethin but.. lol.. but wit juss that one subject i mite have let out a whole lot more bout me. so wit that in note. if its raining where u live next time~ open a window, let the cool air in, get some snacks, put some good music on or watch a movie wit that special someone~ or by yourself. theres a quote, "the sun wont shine since u been away.. rain rain please come again another dai." i say.. fuk sun, rain is the shit". take care all. dont do drugs.

sometimes i wonder why i have xanga when i dont
even write in it. but i come back everydai to check
back on it. out of curiosity or boredom, i always end
up here. i always have somethin to say or a thought
that immediately pops into my head.. but when i
press the button to write new entry.. its too much to
explain. its not that im avoiding mai feelings or pain..
its just i dont need any reason to reveal those. it
dont matta if its either, i dont want u to worry bout
me or if i think its to mushy mushy or juss to soft.i
noticed people write fukin paragraph essays on their
xanga.. and i remember a time when i used to do
that, and it was so ez. but now its juss tiring. but u
kno wut.. ill start todai aite.

::tired::

im tired of worrying bout all the outcomes to one
saying. u dont understand? aite ill give u an example.
lets say im going through a lot pain. it hurts to much.
some people mite think, he aint goin through shit.
aite? no shit im not goin through shit like people
are in africa who are starving everydai and shit,
but who the hell are u to tell me im not going through
anything. i dont gib a fuk if im going through shit
because my fukin tv is broken, or if fart too much. it
differs to e ach person, and feelings vary. this is shit
why i dont wanna write anythin anymore. tired of
people fukin criticizing others.. shittalkers,
backstabbers,bitches,tricks , all that.. all the if ur big
enuff come to mai face and say it.. all that...
thats all Commen sense dont u think? com on now..
dont all people feel they hate those things. and the people
who backstabbs and hates on people, u kno wut they
would say they hate? the same people you might
hate. its an ongoing process. no people like that shit.
so  no one wins a damn fukin argument. its just how
you look on the situation and how u solve it. always..
life goes on. its just a mind state. tired.. haha. nah im
reallie tired. imma knock out.

::randomness::

thinkin ob you this clear dark nite. i grab a cigarette
and i look for the lite. i reminisce the times we shared
and how it felt so rite... diamonds, sunny mornings,
mistful winter nights, dont compare to your beautful
sight. i miss you so much i cant handle this... the
blissful feeling of those luscious lips i wanna kiss...
endless nitess of ecstacy... i juss wanna escape and i
wanna take u wit me. crazily.. maybe... your my
laydee. my baybee... im the one and onlee erik yi..
Come to mee... and i wake up from this dream..